rome

so i've been in rome two plus days... as i told a friend i seem to need more sleep and spend less money...
i am spending a lot on hotel and in a day of eating and touring.. and it occurred to my simple mind that i was holding back it seemed even holding my breath a bit as i partook of the room and it's amenities and also a little of tour or food as if because it cost a lot and i could not hold back money i held myself back.then a little vajrayana buddhism came to mind. life is short and to truly be in the moment is to have an appreciation for what is happening...if the room is a bit of a budget bust, be really there, in it... really lie in that bed, really enjoy the free soaps free wifi and hot shower... let the senses drink it in dont be austere when you dont have to be.. same with food obviously, why withhold enjoyment of something that you just spend money for...unlike more permanent objects of wealth these pleasures have a short expiration date. i have only limited time to use them up so even more reason to really enjoy what is right in front of me...
i have noticed that because ticket prices for various sites such as the coliseum are also a bit high for my budget...though quiet reasonable if you think of all that is included... i really tried to slow down and really appreciate what is in front of me. the camera is a bit of an elaboration in that sometimes taking photos is an excuse for not really looking ( i took a photo i can look at it later) i am actually finding it is helping me to look more closely... i do have an agenda so it is not just looking, in that pure being present way, but sometimes one needs tools till one is ready for next step.. i notice it does absorb me more in what i see inbetween photos as well, also i walk away charged from looking at things this way..looking for a good photo is also looking for an opportunity to see what is beautiful and interesting in the world around me...often it requires a second look with that special eye to make these elements stand out. i have learned from meditation retreat and and sneaking cameras with me that sometimes i have to sit at a spot longer and longer and more wonderful things start arising to my eye..it is like magic...